Every year I take the time to dress up my three young children and force them to smile in the direction of a camera. Usually this turns out well and their beautiful faces can be seen smiling with the best of em. Though this is my family’s story, it is not everyones. Here are a few of my favorite family pictures, brought to you by the internets and asm.com.

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This seems like a simple way to differentiate between the males and females of this family, a thoughtful gesture on their part. However, emasculating the men in the family by making them wear hideous sweaters married with khaki pants and military style hair cuts will only breed insecure serial killers. Just sayin. ******************************************************************************************************************** Yep, thats right. These adults have donned on their favorite winnie the pooh character costume to forever humiliate their little baby that unknowingly thinks that today was the single greatest day of his short little life. The little tyke is having a grand ol time it seems and I suppose that is the biggest part. However, pictures can last forever. Lets stay away from costumes? ******************************************************************************************************************** So wrong, for so many reasons. Let me explain. Parents: You are required to raise these little monsters into successful adults that are willing to contribute  this society to make it a better place. Looking back on my childhood, had my brother come anywhere near me in this fashion my guess would be that it would take a small surgical team to remove my foot from his rear. Dont force your kids into odd and ridiculous poses, they will NOT thank you later. Trust me. ******************************************************************************************************************** A family trip to Sea World becomes the one photo we just cant show grandma from our trip.  We don’t know what this guy was thinking, but he seems to be in an advanced state of foreplay here. Perhaps mom’s missing right hand is to blame? She looks guilty. ******************************************************************************************************************** Matching outfits- $74.99 per person Professional Photography Fee- $124.59 Stealing your children’s dignity while crushing them with your own body weight- Priceless. If you can’t see the fear in their eyes, you aren’t getting through to them. ******************************************************************************************************************** Speaking of serial killers, this young family of six has set an all new standard for family photos. One of these geniuses decided that bringing in the stuffed animals of each family member would somehow change the nature of the family photo into something entertaining. This is a failure. The only person in this photo that doesnt look like they have just cooked their cat in the microwave or snapped the head off the neighbors kids toys is the tiny kid in the middle. The one with the “Please dont let me go home with these freaks” look in his eyes. Look for him, you will know it when you see it! And PS…. This is a terrible photo idea but whoever gave the front kid the apple had a serious lack of forethought. ******************************************************************************************************************** This is the beginning stages of Arrested Development. Listen closely mom, your dancing career is either going or it is over. My guess, from the 80′s getup and the perfect posing of your innocent children, is that it is in fact, over. Perhaps you could spare them the humiliation? I fear that this photo has some prominent display area in the homes of these adults. I hope their children own good running shoes.

Special thanks to THIS website for most of the pictures I have used in this post.

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