They say there is a time and a place for everything, but why then are you stuck sitting through another chick flick while your girlfriend sobs into the popcorn bucket? Congratulations, your dating a crazy. But for those of you that havent figured it out yet, here are the:
ten signs you need to break up.
10. She loves her food.
Along with the ten extra pounds she has put on the last few months, she has also stopped trying altogether. Hygiene is not only common courtesy it is mandatory when you are swapping spit with a person. Lose her.
9. She loves her cats.
One cat is generally okay, though it still says much about the owner. (lonely?) Multiple cats in a single dwelling and you are dealing with a psycho. If she has more than one cat, you shouldn’t date her anyway. If she amasses cats while you are together, you need to break up.
8. She doesn’t shut up about her ex.
If she is still talking about them, she is still thinking about them. Ask yourself why.
7. She talks to your mother, runs your bank account, and decides which messages from your friends to actually give you.
Its break up time, and it couldnt have come soon enough. There is a reason that women try to get close to your mother, and it aint in your best interest. If she also has your PIN and direct access to your fundage, you are screwed. Unless this is a marriage, then you are REALLY screwed.
6. She wants to know where you are.
Where you have been, and where you are going. Having your own life is the integral part of any relationship, without it you become co-dependent leeches that suck the very life out of each other. Get out on your own and insist that she does the same. Dont bother divulging every single last detail of what you do with your time apart.
5. She wont let go of the past.
Maybe you cheated, maybe you forgot the milk when you went to the store. Either way, if she can’t brush it off, she isn’t worth having around. With growth and maturity, everyone eventually comes to the same conclusion.Life happens, and people make mistakes. Find someone at the same level as you, and dump this psycho.
4. Your friends hate her.
Im not talking about your whorey friends that you would make out with should both of you end up in the right circumstances. Im talking about the guys. The GO-TO dudes that you run by all your bad decisions on. If this pack of hooligans isnt a fan of your new boo, ask why. If it sounds like a valid reason, maybe you should listen. If the reason is “because she wont let you play Xbox all night” then you need new friends.
3. Her friends hate her.
Look around the people in her life. What is their overall opinion of this young lass? There is something to be said for the impression that you leave on the people around you, why not check out how other people view her. Ask questions, be polite, and if they all say that you should invest in renters insurance and accidental damage policies on your vehicles….. take note and run.
2. Drama Loves her.
It doesn’t follow some people around like a lost puppy, for no reason. Drama is an infestation into your life, bringing the bullshittery of other peoples lives into your once peaceful existence. All women under the age of 21 are dramatic, and most of them remain drama prone well into the majority of the rest of their lives. However, there is a difference between fighting for a cause you are passionate about, and fighting over the last Gucci bag on the sale rack.
1. The sex sucks.
Right, lets pretend that I gave you
the protect yourself if you are going to have premarital sex speech. Now that that is over, lets be a little more realistic. Most people in adult relationships are having sex with their partners. If that sex goes rapidly downhill, or even slowly floats downhill, something has to be done. Perhaps breaking up is the right answer, but as always, seek professional help first, and I don’t mean hookers.
© 2009, AntiSoccermom. All rights reserved to the original author unless stated otherwise.
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AntiSoccermom is an alternative parenting site for those of us that refuse to parent within the constraints of modern society. Covering everything from parenting to pot-politics, there is always something new to read. Check out AntiSoccermom's Radio show at JohnDoeRadio.com and catch up with her on facebook. 
LOL, it is indeed time for a breakup.
But I thought we were doing so well!
Hm. Have you used google key words to help drive traffic. I think this is a post that might benefit from them.
Whatever do you mean?
It’s a good list by top ten list standards. Though lately I’ve become wary of top tens. They have strange mind-control properties, those t.t.l.’s.
But seriously, good list.
Thanks for the concession to your rule. Top ten lists are pretty lazy, but I find them entertaining. I WRITE WHAT I WANT! Lol. How are you doing man? Im gunshy of xanga, but I try to stop in when I can.
I’m glad someone mentioned the cat thing, cuz I KNEW it wasn’t just me that thought that!
And I was disagreed on just that point! I think it only furthers my commitment that more than one cat=crazy.
I actually have a very serious theory about cat people. (Meaning people who only like/have cats, but not dogs – if you have both species you are exempt)
I keep meaning to write a blog about it, but really, think about it – think about the kind of care involved between dog vs cat and think about the kind of dynamics in the relationship with each species. They are at their core, drastically different. The kind of person it takes to have a good relationship with a cat or several is a completely different person from the kind it takes to have a good relationship with a dog. The cat, in my opinion, appeals to the darker, more negative side of people and the people who have more dark negative than light positive are drawn to cats, whereas people with more light positive than dark negative are drawn to dogs.
I’ve “tested” this theory for years and nearly every time I am right. For example I met someone that was a cat person at first, but he was really nice and sane, it didn’t seem to fit. Well it was explained away when I converted him to a dog person by way of getting him a dog. HAHA. He was a dog person all along.
I also know another person that used to be someone most people didn’t like to hang around. She loved cats. She was all about the cats. Then some crap happened in her life, she grew up and stopped being self-centered, then soon after she was a dog person and only had dogs.
I can literally guess if someone is a dog person or cat person within a few minutes of meeting them. At least in person, online, I don’t do so well, lol. But I am dead serious!!!!
Men AND women need to stay away from cat people in relationships until they grow up and become dog people.
**hides under a rock**
I like the idea and I dont think it is far off. I had cats back when I was insane, now I am a dog person 100%.
Sigh.
(hides with the lamb)
Cat people set me on edge. Well, CATS set me on edge.
Haha!! Cat people ARE crazy!!! I totally agree.
Nice website:) Will come back again soon.